May 2012
46 posts
taste my manpie: the common sense guide to... →
gyzym: So, in the wake of reading this terrifying shit, Postcard and I started chatting, as you do, about the zombie apocalypse. Here are some things Postcard and I enjoy: zombie media, common sense, and YELLING ABOUT STUFF. Thus, for your reading pleasure, please enjoy our simple…
May 30th
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May 28th
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May 28th
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“Introverts, in contrast, may have strong social skills and enjoy parties and...”
– Susan Cain, Quiet (via gabbys-bookshelf)
May 25th
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May 24th
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May 23rd
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May 23rd
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May 23rd
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WatchWatch
treesong: heckyadoctorwho: John Barrowman, ladies and gentlemen. OH MY GOD STOPPIT
May 23rd
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3 tags
Telling my mother how awesome Loki/Tom Hiddleson...
Mom: I just don't think he's that good looking.
Me: Get out now.
Mom: ...
Me: *Finding pictures of His Sexiness* SEE!
Mom: Yeah ok he's pretty cute.
Me: TOLD YOU SO!!
Mom: I guess I just didn't like him because he played a bad guy.
Me: You're cute.
May 23rd
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May 23rd
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May 22nd
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May 20th
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May 19th
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May 16th
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May 16th
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May 15th
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The Doctor Who Fandom and the Olympic Torch
Whovians: You know who has to carry the Olympic Torch and light up the fire?
BBC: Hey, wait a second, you kno-
Whovians: You know who has to do it
BBC: Listen, that was just an episode-
Whovians: You know who.
BBC: It's just fiction.
Whovians: You know who.
BBC: But this series is not that important as-
Whovians: You know.
BBC: But-
Whovians: Or the world will explode
BBC: ...What?
Whovians: It's time law BBC.
BBC: ...
Whovians: It's the law of the universe.
BBC: ....
Whovians: There will be a crack in time.
BBC: I think you take this a bit too seriou-
Whovians: The Doctor will come
BBC: But David hasn't even got time for this, we asked-
Whovians: It's written in history.
BBC: But the Queen-
Whovians: Will not be amused.
May 14th
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May 14th
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May 14th
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May 14th
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May 14th
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May 14th
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May 14th
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May 14th
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The following quotations are taken from official...
Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
Witness: "I only have one, you know."
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Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"
Witness: "By death."
Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
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Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"
The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.
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Lawyer: "What is your date of birth?"
Witness: "July 15th."
Lawyer: "What year?"
Witness: "Every year."
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Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"
Witness: "Gucci sweats and Reeboks."
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Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?"
Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask."
Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?"
Witness: "Er...his face."
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Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
Witness: "I forget."
Lawyer: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?"
-----
Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
Witness: "Forty-five years."
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Lawyer: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
Witness: "He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
Lawyer: "And why did that upset you?"
Witness: "My name is Susan."
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Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
Witness: "No."
Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."
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Lawyer: "What happened then?"
Witness: "He told me, he says, 'I have to kill you because you can identify me.'"
Lawyer: "Did he kill you?"
Witness: "No."
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Lawyer: "Now sir, I'm sure you are an intelligent and honest man--"
Witness: "Thank you. If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment."
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Lawyer: "You were there until the time you left, is that true?"
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Lawyer: "So you were gone until you returned?"
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Lawyer: "The youngest son, the 20 year old, how old is he?"
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Lawyer: "Were you alone or by yourself?"
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Witness: "He was about medium height and had a beard."
Lawyer: "Was this a male or a female?"
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Lawyer: "I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture."
Witness: "That's me."
Lawyer: "Were you present when that picture was taken?"
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Lawyer: "Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?"
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Lawyer: "Do you know how far pregnant you are now?"
Witness: "I'll be three months on November 8."
Lawyer: "Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "What were you doing at that time?"
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Lawyer: "She had three children, right?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "How many were boys?"
Witness: "None."
Lawyer: "Were there girls?"
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Lawyer: "You say that the stairs went down to the basement?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"
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Lawyer: "What is your brother-in-law's name?"
Witness: "Borofkin."
Lawyer: "What's his first name?"
Witness: "I can't remember."
Lawyer: "He's been your brother-in-law for years, and you can't remember his first name?"
Witness: "No. I tell you, I'm too excited." (rising and pointing to his brother-in-law) "Nathan, for heaven's sake, tell them your first name!"
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Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York?"
Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago?"
Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami?"
Witness: "No."
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Lawyer: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?"
Witness: "All my autopsies have been performed on dead people."
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Lawyer: "Were you acquainted with the deceased?"
Witness: "Yes sir."
Lawyer: "Before or after he died?"
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Lawyer: "When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?"
Other Lawyer: "Objection. That question should be taken out and shot."
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Lawyer: "And what did he do then?"
Witness: "He came home, and next morning he was dead."
Lawyer: "So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?"
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Lawyer: "Could you see him from where you were standing?"
Witness: "I could see his head."
Lawyer: "And where was his head?"
Witness: "Just above his shoulders."
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Lawyer: "Any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?"
Witness: "The victim lived."
May 13th
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May 13th
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May 12th
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May 11th
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May 11th
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May 11th
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May 11th
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May 11th
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May 11th
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May 9th
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May 3rd
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May 3rd
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May 2nd
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May 2nd
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April 2012
19 posts
Apr 25th
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Apr 13th
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Apr 11th
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Someone in casting at BBC has a serious cheekbone...
mystinkybutt: This has been a cheekbone appreciation post. Best British Cheekbones Best British Cheekbones BEST BRITISH CHEEKBONES
Apr 10th
12,980 notes